BootsnAll Travel Community

Do you ever look back at your life & think what you would have done differently?

For me, my 20's would have been spent more on experiencing life & finding out who I truly am, rather than jumping directly into uni into something I really wasn't prepared for. After uni, I plunged into a full-time career which has changed so many times. I thought going to uni immediately was the right thing to do, but I think what I really should have done was take off a few months & travel extensively. For me, I know this would have changed the course of my life in a more positive way & made me a stronger, more confident person.

I guess I can go on & on & ask "what if?" til I turn blue, but the main thing is that I'm traveling now, & I'm taking time out to do the things that truly make me happy...and even though I'm no longer in my 20's, I do see my life changing for the better little by little.

Is there anyone else who wonders what their life redo (or partial life redo) would be like?

Jen

For sure, I think everyone constantly think about "what if?"

It's the choices and mistakes we make through in our lives that shape who we are today. All you can do is learn from them and hopefully make better decisions from this point on.

I always think about how I could've done things different with my life. I spent the last six years earning two degrees to work in public accounting. One year into my career and I absolutely hate it. However, if I didn't make that choice six years ago, who knows who I would be today. I could be your typical Joe working in a factory for the rest of my life. I at least now have a job that I can save up enough money to go on an "around the world"!

It's always fun to think about a life redo though huh? I swear I live in my own little world of imagination

This is an interesting question. I think I have done the "what if" stuff, but it's just so hard to know the end (or current) result would be.

Like the last post said, my current life/outlook/personality is, I think, a result of my choices and mistakes and also just circumstances in the past. And, for example, although I absolutely hated high school, and I can imagine that if some things had been different, my life then would have been easier - and likely things now would be different - but maybe then I wouldn't have realized how important it was to me to travel.

Have you seen Sliding Doors? I think this is a great movie to begin with but especially for when you have those "what if" moments.

I think it's natural to say "what if?" And you can learn from it, but I don't think it's good to dwell on. Hind sight is 20/20.

When my gandfather had a great Spanish saying, "Si mi abuela tuviera cojones, sería mi abuelo."

"If my grandmother had balls, she would be my grandfather."

Lots of what if moments but I don't dwell on them, and have no regrets. Every choice creates the path that leads to your life here, now. And I'm happy now.

quote:

And I'm happy now.

That's what it's all about. You're a success!

The main thing is that you are travelling now. Perhaps you wouldn't have appreciated it when you were younger. I think of this too sometimes But I didn't really appreciate travelling until I was almost out of my twenties.

I don't know about you but I realize how fleeting my time is now, not just my travel time but my lifetime. I didn't cherish life as much when I was 20 years old, I do now.

quote:

It's the choices and mistakes we make through in our lives that shape who we are today. All you can do is learn from them and hopefully make better decisions from this point on.

DaveC, how true. I've definitely learned from my past, & I'm using that to my advantage.

Katel - Thanks for suggesting "Sliding Doors". My sister even recommended it to me. I can't wait to see it!

Monkey - I really like your outlook on life & the choices one makes.

my2hthurts - I had a Grandmother like that...she rocked!

Rockabye - You're right - I don't think I would have appreciated travel as much in my early 20's as I do now. The travel bug didn't really bite until these past 3 years, so maybe that's when the appreciation for the world beyond my front door really hit me.

Thanks for all of your comments
Jen

I wonder why this thread is in "Corporate Wasteland"? I'm 24 now and just recently started my career (1 year ago) and man, I am always wondering what else I could've done w/ my life instead. I'm definitely not happy where I am now. Sure I'm "successful" as defined by our capitalistic society (which I'm not against), but I'm sick of being defined by my possessions you know? I'm currently in the process of selling pretty much everything I own except my computer and my camera. So long to my golf clubs, my 350Z, and all my other vices.

I wish I came to this realization 6 years ago, and I'll be a vagabond already enjoying every last inch of this earth learning about myself and the world at the same time. Well, it's better late than never right? I hope to be on my first round the world trip by the time I am 27 in 2.5 years.

Life is too short to be sitting at a desk 8-12 hours a day. When you're at work, ya ever wonder that there are people out there enjoying the greatness of Victoria Falls or Machu Picchu at the very same moment?

Sorry this is kinda off topic... just wanted to rant about the corporate wasteland

I worked hard on my career in my 20s and only discovered travel in my 30s.

The only regret is that I am a far more open minded individual now than I was in my 20s because of the travel so it may have been cool to have discovered travel before.

That said I am glad I discovered travel.

"Do you ever look back at your life & think what you would have done differently?"

No. I regret nothing that I've done.
I might regret some things I haven't done. But not really, because I realize I just haven't done them YET...!

I often wish I hadnt been such a fucking imbecile as a teenager but then I realised that teens just ARE imbeciles.

Im a bit racked off that I never did the uni thing earlier as im now comming into *yet* another career going against younger kids with the same degree - but fortunately I have the experience so the age thing kinda balances it out.

Fundamentally, I think that those of us (generalising here) that society has a generic framework for success that we are supposed to follow. People in your life will either motivate you to follow that path or not. But essentially, assuming you dont have overbearing parents/guardians, you have at least some choice in the matter. Those of us who had no choice but to leave school and work may well have avoided the routine mentioned above but on the flip side have slotted into a routine of our own. Depending on your viewpoint, this could be good or bad.

Kinga makes a very good point and I do wish that some people I know of would understand that. Its doesnt matter how you got to where you are, only where you are going too really.

Do I regret anything? Only comming into work an hour early

Dan - thinking too hard for a Friday

quote:

Originally posted by DaveCSparty:
I wish I came to this realization 6 years ago, and I'll be a vagabond already enjoying every last inch of this earth learning about myself and the world at the same time. Well, it's better late than never right? I hope to be on my first round the world trip by the time I am 27 in 2.5 years.

But if you came to this realization 6 years ago, you wouldn't have the PERSPECTIVE that you now have, which is very valuable in itself, is it not?

quote:

Originally posted by Kinga:
"Do you ever look back at your life & think what you would have done differently?"

No. I regret nothing that I've done.
I might regret some things I haven't done. But not really, because I realize I just haven't done them YET...!

I'm with Kinga. No regrets! If I had to do it all over, I would do everything the same. Of course, people say I'm 'drifting through life', but I guess that just goes naturally with my state of mind. When my life is over, I'll still be looking ahead...

Unlike others, I do have one regret.

Something so deep and dark I can't ever talk to anyone about it!!!!..

But, more to the point, if you never regretted anything you've done in your life, then doesn't that mean that maybe you haven't done enough? odds wise, out of everything you've done, you've got to be regretful of something...

quote:

But, more to the point, if you never regretted anything you've done in your life, then doesn't that mean that maybe you haven't done enough?

Yeah, you're probably right about that... (puts his head down)

What a fantastic thread this is (especially when its 5pm at work and you bored and not really working as your supposed to be and lookin over your shoulder making sure no-one notices you're on the BootsnAll website... *pause for deep breath*)

quote:

I wonder why this thread is in "Corporate Wasteland"? I'm 24 now and just recently started my career (1 year ago) and man, I am always wondering what else I could've done w/ my life instead. I'm definitely not happy where I am now. Sure I'm "successful" as defined by our capitalistic society (which I'm not against), but I'm sick of being defined by my possessions you know? I'm currently in the process of selling pretty much everything I own except my computer and my camera. So long to my golf clubs, my 350Z, and all my other vices.

I'm totally in the same boat as you DaveCSparty, same age to boot. Did the degree, had various jobs, finally got a job in the same area as my degree, and guess what... I ain't all that happy! So May this year was my turning point - began selling lots of my stuff on ebay, stopped going out (as much), etc, etc and can't wait to leave next year for who knows how long.

It's interesting to see most of the people on this thread discussing how they may/may not have done things differently in their 20's. B eing in that period of my life right now I have to say the 'ol 'bug' couldn't have bitten me at a better time. One of my friends has just bought a house, another has just got engaged and I know plenty of people I went to school & college with that are way ahead of them. And good luck to them - I mean this sincerly - that is their choice. All I know is that I don't want any of that right now, and that the prospect of travelling alone has given me a major focus in my life that I lacked before - or perhaps I didn't, maybe the focus preveiously was 'finish school', or 'get a degree' or whatever. Everyone has something that drives them at different times in their life, this in turn affects their long-term situation/life choices. Right now I'm happy (well, I'm not that happy - I'm at work! ) at least about the fact that pretty soon I can be on the road, enjoying myself to the full, and doing something different to what any of my other friends have chosen to do at this time in thier lives.

Time will tell whether or not this decision was the 'right' one to make at my age. Maybe you'll see another posting on this thread in a few years with me asking the same question...!

Lancashire, I know exactly what you mean about your friends. So many people I know are getting engaged/married and buying houses/condos, moving on to the next phase of their lives. I wish them the best of luck, but I just don't understand how people in their early 20s can be so sure of what they want to do for the rest of their lives. Will they come to question their lives like we are now? Maybe 20 years from now?

I also agree with you regarding the short term focuses we have through out our lives. In high school was to get accepted to a good college, then it was to graduate college, then get a great job. Check, check, and check...am I ever going to be satisfied? The next focus of my life (RTW) will lead me closer I believe. For the first time I'm doing something to maybe make myself happy instead of conforming to the wants and needs of my parents/friends/society.

I'm going to leave behind everything I've worked for this past few years, and a great job that'll give me a "bright future". Who cares though if I'm not happy doing it? So many people tell me "it's a job, it's not supposed to be fun, it's just for money". That's a sad way of living isn't it? You spend more than half of your waking life devoted to work afterall.

Hopefully on my RTW I can find something I love and passionate about. Something I can see myself doing for a long time, even if it means I have to give up a safe secure future. For that, I hope I do not regret.

Wow, that was a long rant.

I think a lot of them will come to question their lives in 20 years time DaveCSparty, and for many of them this will be their mid-life crisis point.

The friend of mine - the one who just bought a house - is one of those who, no matter how hard I try and explain, can understand why I want to go travelling at our age. In his mind your youth is supposed to be spent acheiving things and expending your energy on doing 'constructive' activities. He also told me that he'd go travelling 'one day', later in his life when he has done everything else he wants to do first. As much as I completely respect his point of view, I did point out that by the time he's 40/45 years old or whatever, the responsibilities he will have accumulated will most likely stop him from going anywhere unless he is prepared to sacrifice the lifestyle he will have grown accustomed to. I don't think he quite understood or beleived what I was saying, but that said he is very materialistic by nature (he bought a flash car he can't really afford to 'go with' the house - y'know, to impress the neighbours and all...).

I guess what I'm saying is that like yourself I'm kinda glad I've made the decision to travel now rather than later in life, after all, its better to be able to say that you gave something a go, rather than having regrets about not having tried in the first place.

When I come back with pictures and memories of far-off lands and life changing experiences, they will each count as an acheivement of my own.

Now that was a long rant my son .