BootsnAll Travel Community

Hey, BNAers! Don't know if I should put this in this forum or volunteering or the Asia destination forum. My soon to be husband want to spend between 1-4 weeks on a buddhist monestary somewhere in SE Asia on our RTW trip starting in November. We would love to volunteer teaching Monks, but that is not neccissary. We would prefer for this experience to be as remote and authentic as possible, but we understand that we will not be there for very long, so that may be difficult.

* Has anyone had a similar experience?
* Would it be possible for us (a man and woman) to live together at the same monestary?
* Should we wait until we get there to find one, or research/book it before treking out?
* I am under the impression that it will cost money to do this. About how much should we expect to have this experience?

Any other advice for us? Thanks a bunch!
All the good stuff,
Laurie

this sounds so neat. good thing you're going on your trip first so you can tell me what you find out! hha :-)

I wonder if you can say a little more about what you both want. I've been a Buddhist since I was 13 (I'm 61 now, so you do the math), and while I haven't been to a monastery in Asia, I've hung around quite a few in the USA, and I may be able to give you a bit of help in planning. Are you going for a spiritual experience? Have you practiced Buddhism in the USA? Do you expect to sit in meditation for several hours a day? I think it's great that you want to do this, but I could give you more useful information if I knew a little more about your reasons for doing this and your expectations. For example, in most monasteries you would be expected to sleep in separate dorms, to maintain celibacy, and to keep silence for most of the hours you are there. It would be an unusual way to spend a honeymoon, but it might be the very thing you're looking for; vive la difference! As to the expenses--most monasteries will ask you to give "dana," a gift of what you feel the experience is worth to you. Some that have quite a lot of tourist traffic may have suggested donations, but I don't know of any Buddhist monasteries that are in the business of making money off visitors. Giving from your heart, and receiving what is offered, is part of the philosophy. Still, there are many different "Buddhisms"--you can find just about anything under that umbrella. If you find a Buddhist center you can ally with in the USA, they probably have some connections with centers in Asia.

Thanks so much Grannygold for your response. I think the concept of the dana is beautiful. We are both very flexible about our expectations concerning this experience. We have no problem sleeping away from eachother for a bit. Neither of us are practicing Buddhists although we both meditate. We are particulary interested in the cultural aspect of visiting a monastery away from the hustle and bustle.

THanks so much for your responses!

Ah! Away from the hustle and bustle! Those were the magic words. Now I get it. Sure. This can work. It's a Retreat. That's the concept used at many monasteries--they provide a place for people to retreat from the world, to meditate, and to gather energy and spiritual force. What country are you thinking about? There are wonderful Buddhist retreat centers in Myanmar, India, Vietnam, Thailand, and Japan. There are also many ashrams in India. If you want to arrange something ahead, you can, or you can leave it to chance. You can even travel from one center to another, making a pilgrimage. Best way to get info ahead of time is to find a Buddhist center near you and start practicing there; then find out where their "root" practice comes from and where their "root" temple or monastery is. Or just go by synchronicity. This can definitely work!

Hi GrannyG. Not to the thread, but just wondering if there were any monasteries in the U.S. you have been to that you particularly felt were good places for retreat. I have a feeling you are a good person to ask about this.

I wonder why you might think that! Chuckling. Thanks for asking. The meditation centers I have personally found most useful are the Vipassana centers (any of them). Insight Meditation Center in Barre, MA is also wonderful. I also love Deer Park Monastery in Escondido, California; ShaShambhalambhala Center in Colorado; and KrKripaluipalu Center in Massachusetts (more of a spa and education center than a spiritual center these days, but it continues to evolve and has some helpful programs). One place I would still like to visit is SravSravastiasti Abbey in eastern Washington State. I'm also on my way this coming summer to Green Gulch Farm (north of San Francisco) and Upaya Zen Center (in Santa Fe, NM). I spent a year in monastic training at a little Vietnamese monastery called Universal Door right here in Texas, but I decided it wasn't the right path for me. Very powerful experience, though. Sometimes you need to know what doesn't work. I also spent four years associated with a wonderful Buddhist Retreat Centre in South Africa (not a monastery, but it entertains many people who are monastics and who live monastic lifestyles). There was a very helpful book published about a decade ago (and now out of date) called Buddhism in America. If you can put your hands on a copy, even though it's out of date, it lists hundreds of meditation centers, retreat centers, and monasteries in the USA. Again, thanks for asking.

quote:

Originally posted by Grannygold:
I wonder why you might think that!

I don't really know. Good instincts, eh?

I'm really sort of a "Buddhist-lite" myself I feel very at home in the religion and values, but .... I'm a bit lazy on follow through.

My main exposure has been through Sharon Salzberg visiting New York and the wacky Robert Thurman, but I've never been to IMS in Barre. I have friends who have gone and loved the experience there.

The only retreat I've been on was to Menla, on retreat with Sharon and Bob. Which was like, the Rolls Royce of meditation retreats I'm gathering, with gourmet vegetarian food and free yoga classes. heh heh. Did I mention I was "Buddhist-lite"?

So thanks so much for the tips, I would like to think about going on more. Perhaps I will start another thread on differences among different schools of Buddhist thought, don't want to derail this one any further.

And thanks so much for this!

quote:

There was a very helpful book published about a decade ago (and now out of date) called Buddhism in America. If you can put your hands on a copy, even though it's out of date, it lists hundreds of meditation centers, retreat centers, and monasteries in the USA. Again, thanks for asking.

Ah, wonderful Sharon Salzberg. I did a workshop with her in Northampton, MA. I'll look for the new thread, Christina, but I don't think you're so far off topic with this.