BootsnAll Travel Community

Sometimes on our way it is not all good. I have seen many horrific sights on my travels, things that you perhaps would rather avoid. In 1992 I was in India and saw horrific things for the very first time beggars, leprosy terrible poverty etc. My point is that before setting off on my travels I was quite a depressive kind of guy who frequently felt sorry for myself considering that I was dealt a raw deal in life compared to my middle class friends at university. These horrific sites cured me of my depressive nature and since I have had no repetition. So in a way witnessing the horror has benifitted me as I am cured and if I want to feel the tiniest bit sorry for myself I consider the leper or beggar and think immediatley how lucky I am.
Have any of you had similar cures for depression.

For me, there's no such thing as a horrific site. There is terrible suffering everywhere, and I ache for that suffering. I identify with those who are suffering and usually end up admiring them, figuring they're doing better with what came to them than I would do if our places were changed. We all do the best we can with the suffering that comes to us, and not everybody can deal with it. I DON'T believe the universe never gives us anything we can't handle: if that were true, there would be no alcoholism, no drug addiction, no suicide, no family violence, no child abusers, etc. Some of us get more than we can handle. Great sadness. So there are places I have been that have deepened my compassion, or deepened my respect for the human ability to transcend crushing circumstances, but the closest I've come to "horrific" is being lost in downtown Houston on foot during rush hour, with streams of air conditioned SUVs, Hummers, and diesels pouring poison into the air on a day when it's 98 degrees F, 98% humidity, and the weather service has issued a red warning for "dangerous ozone levels."

Matengu, I know what you mean, and I'm ready to send my very self absorbed mother in law off for "the cure".

However, the most horrific place I've seen is East St. Louis. The horrific part is that there are people who live like that in what is considered the richest and most powerful nation on earth. Sure. Of course, I've not been to India, so can't answer to that, but I'm willing to bet the people there would give you their last shirt if they thought you needed one, and that would not be true of many from ESL. Or even those from the wealthy suburbs of SL.

when i get back from a volunteer service trip with my students i get a little depressed when they say all they learned was how fortunate they are and how they really have nothing to complain about.
the end.

it makes me sad that they are stuck in that same self-absorbtion they started out in...and the folks they met along the way (who were suffering) were nothing but little reminders to them of how lucky they were.

want I WANT to see is that they are moved beyond themselves into a state of compassion. AFTER that step of , gee,im pretty lucky...then what can you do to serve/love/elevate the life of the suffering person who revealed to you this truth?

i hope traveling teaches us this compassion and helps us be creative in our responses to others.

if not, havent we just watched one big entertaining tV show with not lasting effects on us?

zopa

I get your point but the route of all these horific things that are happening to people lie exclusively to western governments and developing countries governments. So any suggestions on how your students could tackle them and show any compassion

sure, easy.

each one of us has in front of us at any given moment infinite possibilites of how we can make the world a beter place. as mother teresa said, its a matter of working with what is right in front of you and of doing small things, but with great love.

when we convince ourselves we are powerless in the face of the difficulites in the world,then we are defeated. when we allow ourselves to stay overwhelmed and intimidated by the immensity of the suffering, then we remain paralyzed, and that is pretty much the same as being ignorant and paralyzed or being escapist and paralyzed.

through travel (and through other life experiences) some of us have been/are *lucky* enough to have seen/experienced/lived in that "seedy underside of life" where suffering is most obvious. awesome.

now what?

now, like Viktor Frankl, holocaust survivor and writer says, we get to choose our own attitude (and that choice is our freedom which can *never* be taken from us). is my attitude going to be one where i convince myself its just too damn big to confront so i remain paralyzed, or is it going to be one where i realize, its just too damn big to confront, so im going to do something about it anyway.

nobody needs a blueprint for how to bring more goodness into the lives of others. it is inherent to our humanity.

on a day-to-day level
look around the hostel, is someone there an outcast (even in these, temporary societies of hostel life)? am I going to make the extra effort to talk to them? am i going to offer to share some of my grub with another traveller so we arent all cooking rice alongside each other and eating in silence? am i willing to risk them rejecting me in order to potentially create a wonderful meal filled with laughter and companionship (all the while we are eating the same simple grub we had planned to eat)

on a larger level
i can blame global warming in x, i can blame genocide on y, i can blame the prostitution of children on z. i can hold all sorts of opinions on all sorts of topics, assigning blame as i see fit. but so what? what will it take for me to start doing something, to start reacting, to escape from my paralysis? there is always something that can be done.

See, Judge, Act, is the formula.

zoppy

I can understand that your theory would work as long as everyone took part. But I think not most travellers are just out to enjoy themselves regardless of what the local population is going through or even in ignorance of what the local population are going through. There are a few who try to make a small difference by helping out in a mother theresa way but I feel are insignificant on the whole compared the machine that is the american dream. It is difficult in these couldn't care less days to persuade people to help their elderly neighbour let alone a stranger in a different culture. I am not disagreeing with your sentiment I totally buy into it but I think people like me and possibly you are the exception rather than the rule. So how do we become the rule and not the exception

quote:

Originally posted by Zopa:
when i get back from a volunteer service trip with my students i get a little depressed when they say all they learned was how fortunate they are and how they really have nothing to complain about.
the end.

Everyone has a different schedule. Zopa I know it can be really frustrating to feel the apathy of others in the face of so much suffering in the world, to wish others would just try a little harder, because a little action can have such a big effect on the lives of others. But we don't really know what other people do in their lives, perhaps those people do more than it seems.

Experiencing other cultures is a powerful tool for change, and very few people are completely unaffected. The Buddhists focus on the mind as the place where change begins -- if you change your mind, action can follow, but if the mind is untouched, action won't come.

If seeing some truly deep poverty can make a person look differently at the iPod they were just craving before their trip, or whether or not they really need 3 pairs of the same jeans, or a supersize popcorn because it's just 50 cents more .... that's actually a deeply radical shift. Especially in a society like ours.

If someone had no idea of their own material wealth in the States and just realized for the first time some perspective on that, that's actually very hopeful, I think.

Just imagine the environmental, economic, political repercussions if we all suddenly had a sense of wealth, and stopping generating demand for STUFF because we had a reality check.

I agree I think. I think if someone comes back thinking "I am really incredibly lucky" then surely that can be a very powerful change-agent in that person's life? For a start, realising that 99.9% of where you're at is all about LUCK - you might like to think that you are where you are because of hard work, or your parents hard work, or whatever, but if you happen to be born in the slums of Kinshasa or Calcutta then actually you'll be pretty lucky to make it to your first birthday, whether your parent work hard or not.

Dont get me wrong - I am not saying that hard work never got anyone anywhere. What I mean is that I think many rich people (and I include all and any of us that have access to this website on a daily basis) feel that they are entitled to a lot because they put a lot of work in. When actually alot of very poor people work even harder.

I know that for me personally, that realisation has changed a lot about how I try to live (whether I succeed is a different matter) - whatever the complete coincidence and/or cosmic powers (I tend to believe in the former but who knows) that put me where I am, I feel obligated to myself to do something good with it.

Having said all that, I appreciate the point (which perhaps was your point Zopa) of view that some people might come back from travels thinking ONLY 'thank god thats not me' and not having really taken in any of the culture or richness of another place and people. Which is pretty lame.

Incidentally, not sure about using destitute people you have met as "a cure for depression"?!

quote:

Originally posted by go girl:
However, the most horrific place I've seen is East St. Louis.

True. Too true.
In the movie, National Lampoon's "Vacation", some may recall the scene where Chevy Chase & his family are in a station wagon temporarily stopped (at a red light, IIRC), and while they're waiting there in their car, their hubcaps are taken off & stolen away. A lot of St. Louis locals will tell you how "realistic" that scene was.

We'll see on the news that the city is so corrupt & broke that it's Illinois State police, not anything local, that patrol it.

-truly deep poverty can make a person look differently at the iPod-

So I looked at my iPod differently - I turned it around and had a look at the back
it said "Assembled in China" - hmmm - perhaps by someone who is trying to escape rural poverty.

I think you got me wrong as selling horrific sights as a cure for depression I was just pointing out that personally I am no longer a depressive person and I truly believe that is down to my early travels and the sights that I saw. Otherwise I think the point is made that we are lucky in the lottery of life and if we have any thing about us we should do at leasta small thing to help impoverished people in any developing country we may visit

Nomination for Best of the Boards, or am I missing something?

I read the original post and was like, yeah. That's me too, and then I really identified with what Zopa said about her students, I have thought the exact same thing.

Everyone here is right.

Over new years our family had an awesome weekend at a friend's house on the island of Mindoro. There was no electricity or running water. The house is concrete blocks with an unfinished upstairs. The bathroom was a concrete room with two shallow tubs of water and a very worn interesting looking toilet. This was our second trip there. We had a great time the first time, too.

The family has a bicycle for transportation with a cage on the side that's usually to transport items. This family also transports the kids in it. My son, who just turned 13 rode the bike with the kids in the side down the dirt road past all the rice fields, we're surrounded by rice fields, absolutely goregeous. I waited for him in the front of the house, watching him pedal with gusto back my way, biggest smile on his face, kids laughing at the speed and the wind in their hair. I thought, this is all worth it.

When he rode up I said, "Why are you getting all dirty and sweaty?" Really, this is what I said. It's like stop being a mom for a second. But he could sense my peaceful happy demeanor, it's like I just had to say something (unfortunately).

So, after this weekend my son says, mom I haven't had an exciting weekend like this in a long time. Not, gee I'm so lucky, they have nothing.

But still, I feel lucky.For that reason...but...

I also feel lucky that they are my friends.

Our next trip will be even better because we bought them a matching pig to go with the one they saved up for and purchased. We'll get to see them!