Nobody has ridiculed us about our travel plans but maybe that's because everyone knows that we march to the beat of our own drummer. We got married right out of college--the first of our friends to do so---but are one of the few remaining childless couples. We get some strange looks and questions as to when we are going to settle down, but nobody has directly voiced any opposition or skepticism toward our long-term travel plans. It also helps that my husband and I have presented a united front on our desire to travel long-term.
roscoe - It's too bad that your married friends are trying to put pressure on you to get married and have kids. Unfortunately, I don't think that pressure ever goes away regardless of whether you get married or not. We get a good bit of questioning and pressure from people as to when we are going to have kids; literally, strangers ask me in the grocery store when we are going to have kids after they find out we have been married so long. My mom claims that people constantly ask her when she is going to retire even though she has no interest in retiring. I find that people always want to try to "help" lead my life by suggesting that I follow their own path. I just smile and continue on as I want. What else can you really do?

gojonesgo wrote:And, Landire, tell your mother that there are loads of people much older than 49 out there on RTW trips right this very moment. Hell, I turn 40 this year and I'd hate to think I'm that close to my "travel sell-by date"...

Thank you! I will be sure to tell her. I've been trying to tell her this for years. She worried for several years about being too old to be an EMT. And now she is one! I think she likes to use her age as a security blanket from things she's a bit afraid of.

Thanks Trapped Artist, I just recently decided to go ahead with my RTW plans and I guess I haven't developed my thick skin just yet!

Well at 60+ traveling solo through Central America & Cuba last winter a few friends thought I was a bit crazy & think the same about my 16 month RTW in Aug but what really sets them off are my plans to settle in Guatemala.

As wildcat says people can't understand why he/she isn't focusing on getting married...how exactly do you focus on getting married? My understanding has always been that this is something that should come naturally and as I've said I don't believe in a set schedule for how my life should progress.

Roscoe, I too, am confused on how one focuses on getting married....I gave up listening to all the ridiculous suggestions of my family many years ago. The only schedule I'm on is the one that's meant for me...and I'm having a blast!! How many people can honestly say that about their lives? I quit my corporate job 8 months ago and the only thing I miss is the free coffee.

Joseph Campbell said "follow your bliss"; he was onto something good.

Was on a date with a girl yesterday and told her I had planned on going on a gap-year RTW backpacking trip and she laughed at it, calling it unrealistic.

I think that point it would have been unrealistic to think you guys were a good match and that you'd be going out again....

PC

I graduated from a physics department, meaning lots of people perfectly happy to never leave the lab, and it was interesting to hear how many people thought the idea of me traveling was mad. "Even Jules Verne needed only 80 days!" was one of the more entertaining objections because a. he didn't and b. it's fiction and c. it's obviously not the point.

I'm going back there for grad school in about a month so it will be interesting to see what the reactions are then.

I was asked why I didn't want to break it into chunks too. Like 3-4 months.

I just think that would be a BIG hassle. I'd rather leave my job and do it all at once. I don't have to worry about apartment subletting/lease issues, having to readjust every time I came back, having to go through it all over again next time I want to travel another 3-4 months...

And thanks to everyone for the responses. Very nice to hear from like-minded ppl out there.

I've never been ridiculed but it is certainly something that my friends in the US just don't "get." I was in two weddings the month before I left on my RTW trip last November and both of my best friends think that I should be following on that track of life...they don't ridicule me but they do wonder what the heck I am doing.

I also get the people telling me I am ruining my chances to get married and have kids down the line someday becuase I am getting old (at the ripe age of 25).

Like everyone has said, it's just not the right choice for everyone so I have just really ignored most of those negative comments.

~Shannon

Follow my RTW travel blog: http://www.alittleadrift.com

I'd like to hear from the Europeans on this board about their thoughts on this. Some say it's common for most young Europeans to do this. Is this true?

I've gotten a lot of negativity from my parents unfortunately, but my friends are actually rather supportive. Then again, most of them are seasoned travelers. On a side note, my high school reunion is just a couple of weeks before I leave. Can't wait for all the perplexed looks and "you're crazy" responses I'll get that night

I also get the people telling me I am ruining my chances to get married and have kids down the line someday becuase I am getting old (at the ripe age of 25).

Like everyone has said, it's just not the right choice for everyone so I have just really ignored most of those negative comments.

If 25 is old, then I'm in trouble I get the "get married" line from my family all the time, but at least they piped down a bit once my sister started having kids. All I will say is that everyone's situation is different, and starting a family just because everyone else does at your age doesn't strike me as a very good idea.

Oh yes. Mostly from our parents and their peers. So far there have been three recurring themes:
1) It will be a colossal waste of time and money.
2) We are searching for the meaning of life in all the wrong places.
3) We ought to stop putting off "adulthood" and just have some kids already, since we apparently have so much time on our hands and money to burn.

All of our friends think it's an awesome idea and have been very encouraging. I've found that it helps to have answers to questions prepared in advance, so it's obvious you've thought it through. We've gotten a lot of questions about our cats, our house, our jobs, our itinerary, etc. The funniest question I've heard so far was when my mother-in-law asked if there is really a year's worth of places to go see. LOL.

But yeah, wherever you are in life, there are always social expectations in terms of accomplishments and goals. The usual life goals involve marriage, a house, kids, nice vehicles, career advancement, package vacations, etc. And they don't go away; competition and expectations don't magically cease at retirement. As soon as you accomplish one goal, there's always another one on the horizon. It is human to compare and compete. Most people want reassurance that their desires are "normal" and that they are achieving success as compared to their peers. When they encounter someone who doesn't fit their idea of the norm, it disrupts their self-image, because it calls into question their own accomplishments and decisions.

Thus all negative responses to stepping off the treadmill and going RTW. The more negative the response, the more insecure the person. And for what it's worth, I think this kind of introspection is normal among older generations because as folks near retirement, they tend to start to thinking retrospectively about their life's accomplishments, their legacy, and what else they want to do before they start to decline. When they start hearing from the younger generations that their essential priorities aren't the same, it's freak out time. Their entire life's work becomes devalued. Thus the predominance of negativity from parental units. Same thing with folks who have kids and invoke pressure on those who don't have any (or God forbid, even want them). Children require a huge committment of resources and energy, so parents need constant societal reassurance that their investment is valued. The surest form of this comes when their peers make the same choice for their own life. When their peers decline to do so, it devalues their investment, and quite probably they've committed to many more future years of parenthood. Hence the freak out.

My non-professional socio-psychological theory of the day.

3) We ought to stop putting off "adulthood" and just have some kids already, since we apparently have so much time on our hands and money to burn.

haters, haters, haters!! are they trying to drag us down with them? what's so great about "adulthood" and kids? I'd rather see a sunset over a sandune in Namibia.

Liforce I think you pretty much have it right, retired friends that I traveled around Canada with think I am strange in wanting to do an RTW especially staying mostly in hostels . They just want to sit at home & enjoy their possessions. Oh well!!

Met 2 18 yr old girls in Antigua on a gap year, they were doing a 6 month volunteer project in Central & South America, followed the blog of one of the group & they were having a blast & will be better prepared to face life when done.

You nailed it Liforce. There are exceptions, but it seems like the further along someone is in regard to the generally accepted life path, the worse their response to someone breaking from the norm.

I've started responding to some of the naysayers by pointing out the positives of long-term travel: an open mind, an improved sense of self-sufficiency, and a better idea of who you are and what you want out of life. Ultimately I too want some of the things everyone else is pining for (good career, family, etc), at least to an extent, but I'm still figuring out exactly what I want and how to go about it. Travel forces a total change in your day-to-day habits, makes you see things differently, and might even open your eyes to possibilities that you never would have considered had you stayed back home.